Chuck Norris

I was thinking of writing this post last week, but after a few Chuck Norris facts were thrown around a group e-mail today, I knew it was time for the post.

I think Chuck Norris facts are hilarious. What are they? Chuck Norris Facts are “satirical “facts” about martial artist and actor Chuck Norris which have become an Internet phenomenon and as a result have become widespread in popular culture. The facts tent to involved jokes and plays on claims of Norris’ toughness, attitude and virility alpha-male status, sophistication and masculinity stated in an absurdly serious tone, for example.” (taken from Wikipedia!)

With that explanation, here are some of my favorite Chuck Norris facts; hopefully this post will provide you with a LOL!

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity, twice.

When the boogeyman goes to bed at night, he checks under his bed for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn’t read books, he stares them down until he gets the information he wants out of them.

When Chuck Norris does a push up he isn’t pushing himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make him drink.

Contrary to popular belief, the United States isn’t a democracy but a Chucktatorship.

Chuck Norris doesn’t get frostbite, Chuck Norris bites frost.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch; he decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.